While it may seem like it should be easy to speak with our partners about sex, it often is not. We may feel uncertain as to what the problem really is, fear hurting our partner by indicating that we have not been enjoying sex, or even believe that it is not that important and is easier to just ignore. However, it is important to discuss these concerns with your partner in order to maintain a fulfilling relationship. Here are some tips that may help you get started.

  • Set a time to talk when neither of you are pressed for time, overly stressed, frustrated or angry at one another.
  • Consider speaking with your therapist or counselor. Sometimes there may be events or experiences that have clouded our feelings about sexual intimacy. Therapists and counselors may be able to help you uncover these issues and help you work through them as well as offer suggestions on improving communication with your partner.
  • Encourage your partner to take the Questionnaire for Partners so that you can discuss the answers.
  • Do not blame your partner or yourself.
  • Share how your medications or symptoms may be impacting you sexually.
  • Bring your partner with you to an appointment, so that they can ask questions and hear the recommendations that are made.
  • Be open to your partner’s thoughts, feelings, and ideas.